"Tired of Being By Yourself?"
October 21, 2009
Hello chirrens. Well bless the name of the Lard Jesus Christ for all he have did for Granny. This here is the day that the Lard have made and that is why come Granny is always joycing and glad in whatsomever is going on cuz long as Granny got bref in the body and can git half ways round, that’s a good thang.
Granny had a bad night last night. Arthur was cutting up in Granny right leg and plus Granny head was hurting real bad. They got that swines flu going round and y’all know that was the first sompfin that went thu Granny mine. But then Granny went to pleadin the blood of Jesus cuz Granny ain’t got no time to be laid up.
Anyways Granny turnt on the tv in the milla of the night. This was affa Granny spunt time in the bible cuz anytimes you can’t sleep, that’s the Lard saying come spend a lil time wif him. Leastways that’s what Big Mama use to say. So affa Granny spunt a lil time wif the Lard Granny turnt on that tv and Jesus! It’s a good thang they re play the Okrah show cuz Granny missed it from earlier in the day. Well to tell the truth Granny don’t warch Okrah ever day cuz she have too many whiny peepose on there who ain’t got no real prollems. They be making up stuff to be miserble bout. So when Granny warched the replay of the Okrah show cuz wun’t nuffin else on, did y’all see them 10 womens on there what got fected wif the HIVD from that one man? Is that some mess or what? And y’all know it’s more than 10 womens out there he done fected. The worstest part is that fool knowed he had the HIVD and gaved it to them womens on purpose.
Now ‘fore y’all go to feeling sorry for them womens, this here is what Granny wanna speak on. All the wrong can’t be placed on that man. He was wrong as two leff shoes but he ain’t all the way wrong. Just like Granny warched the tv last night when ol’ arthur had Granny leg hurtin real bad, y’all need to warch the tv and read the paper and go to the innanet thang and fine out for y’all selfs bout this here HIVD mess. All them womens thowed good sense out the winnow when they pulled down they underdraws and let that man stick his fected thang up in they coochie cooch and shoot out sompfin worster then rat poison up in they innards. Why come? Cuz they was in love. And he prolley was seeing two-three of them womens at the same time cuz that is exacatively what mens do. Oh yes they do.
See chirrens, that’s where womens be gitting messed up. Womens be’s so busy in love and forgit bout the good sense that the Lard gaved them. Granny done did some foolish thangs one too many times too but not nuffin that would put Granny life on the line. No Lardie. Y’all womens need to cool y’all hot selfs off and ax some quershons and don’t be scurred to runned a man off cuz he just might need to have his as- butt ranned off. The same go true for the mens cuz don’t thank y’all is the onliest scannerlous ones out there. The diffence is this here - womens be lookding for love while the mens is lookding for what they can git. Listen at Granny womens. When a man be so busy tryna git the draws that he don’t ax no quershons, that fool is nasty. And mens, if a gal is so in love that she don’t ax no quershons, she silly. And if she give it up real easy like and don’t ax no quershons, she prolley done gaved it up easy like to somebody who ain’t knowed they got the HIVD just like them 10 womens on the Okrah. Seem like to Granny that lease one of them womens woulda bend gitting a HIVD test on the reguller but they ain’t knowed they had the HIVD til it camed on the news. Lard only knows who they done past it on to cuz don’t none of ‘em have no safe sex. But the onliest safe sex is what Granny do. Long as Granny sittin on it, it’s safe.
One more nother thang. Don’t y’all thank that that man who fected them 10 womens is the onliest somebody who know he got HIVD and ain’t done nuffin bout it. Even worster then that is the mens who got it and don’t know it. Cuz y’all know mens don’t go see no doctor. Mother Franklin husman got all kinda stuff wrong and he ain’t tooked his self to the doctor but he will git in a prayer line and then leave church and go eat hog maws and greasey chitlins swimmin in ketchup and hot sauce.
Here go sompfin else. Hoochie coochin ain’t the onliest nasty thang. Y’all womens oughta not even wanna kiss no man wiffout axing some quershons like when the last time he seent a dennis and had his teefses cleant. And how many womens he done had his mouf all on. (And how many mens too while you bull tickin.) Cuz if he quick to put his mouf all over you then he was quick to put his mouf all on some other womens and there you is letting him put his fishy mouf all on yo mouf. Whew that is nassssssty.
Chirrens, Granny is tryna help y’all cuz this HIVD ain’t going nowheres. It is on the loose all cuz peoples don’t stop to ax no quershons. Granny unnastand that it be hard keeping yo self cuz ever now and then Granny nature rise too, specially when Granny flash back on some of them jokers from back in the day. There was this one name Red. He was light skinded wif red freckos and Granny would tip out to the cotton patch affa dark and meet him and have mercy. Whew whew! Granny need a cold showver just thankin back on it! Thank ya Jesus! But good as that hoochie coochin was, ain’t nuffin worf trading Granny healf and skrenf cuz ain’t no ways in the world Granny gonna trade Granny good years up a head for some good hoochie cooch that just might have some HIVD mixed in wif it. Ain’t nuffin that daggone good. Yes, bless them womens heart. They ain’t axed no quershons cuz they was tired of being by theyselfs. Womens, y’all can eiver be at home by yo selfs or in a casket by yo selfs. Eiver way, you gonna be by yo self.
www.EverybodyLovesGranny.com
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